Supermums! Balancing motherhood and an active lifestyle
In recognition of Mother's Day, here the national charity the English Federation of Disability Sport (EFDS) has assembled a group of women to discuss leading active lifestyles as disabled mothers.
Traditionally Mother's Day was the day designed for you to send a handwritten letter to your mother expressing love and gratitude. But these days it’s been replaced by breakfast in bed, a spa day or the single most popular gift at this time of year – a bunch of flowers.
EFDS knows that many disabled mothers like to keep fit, but our research shows that seven in 10 disabled people would like to undertake some, or more, physical activity.
Additionally, other research suggests that the more active mothers are the more active their children are likely to become. The study, published a year ago, suggests policies developed to improve children’s fitness should be targeted at mothers.
Gemma Morton (fitball, various gym classes)
Ethan is my world. He is in Year 5 at school and is thriving. I try to keep myself fit and active so that I can keep up with him!
I have retinitis pigmentosa (RP, an inherited, degenerative eye condition) and when I was pregnant I was told that Ethan would either have the same condition or he would be totally blind. But he was born with no eye condition, other than having to wear spectacles.
I am an administrator-receptionist for the Royal National College for the Blind in Hereford, where I use assistive technology on computers and a magnifier for small writing. Plus, I have a gorgeous guide dog called Ida, who I have had for almost a year – she is my first guide dog and she has given me back my independence.
When I was younger I used to swim every day, but as you get older life seems to take over and exercise seems to take a back seat. I have recently restarted doing my exercise because I want to get back in to shape, so that I feel good about myself again.
Some days it takes a lot of motivation to force myself out of bed at six o’clock, but I am always glad that I did.
My aim is, like many women, to lose some weight in time for the summer! And feel fitter so I can chase Ethan around and enjoy my time with him.
There are practical things that I cannot do with Ethan, such as walk him to school, take him to places in the dark alone or drive. But Ethan has never known any different. I have never hidden the fact that I may not be able to see him as a grown man - this is the only thing that breaks my heart.
Balancing keeping fit, being a mother and living with my disability can be tricky at times, but I like to think that I’m pretty organised and I always make sure that my visual impairment doesn’t hold me back for whatever reason. I just want to be able to exercise, be a great mum and run my home.
Nyree Kindred (swimming)
Of course, bringing up a child is challenging, but being disabled just means you learn to adapt to situations and the day-to-day routine.
I began swimming around the age of five, so I have always been active. As someone with cerebral palsy it’s good for relaxing muscles, and of course physical activity is great for anyone, disabled or non-disabled.
I enjoy swimming because it’s something I've always done, I can move freely in the water and it allows me to stay active. There are obvious health benefits to being active, including cardiovascular training and a form of hydrotherapy that helps keep my muscles active and loose.
My daughter, age three, is not disabled. As her mother, I wouldn't say I juggle being disabled with being a mum - I just do things in the best way that I'm able to.
I simply try to see myself as a parent who enjoys exercise and staying active. I try not to let the fact I have a disability change that.
Gemma Trotter (spinning, exercise instructor)
When I first started going to the gym I was really down. I had lost my leg but had started walking again, and then I stopped walking and put on a load of weight and I was really insecure.
I got really down, but someone asked me if I’d ever tried going to the gym. Initially I thought it would be over my dead body, because I had one leg, everyone would stare at me, and I was fat.
But I braved it, went there six days a week from then on, and the only break I had was when I had my son Archie.
He’s very active, and that’s really, really important to me. I couldn’t bear thinking of him becoming a couch potato. I worry about him; I think I’m slightly paranoid. But I make sure he eats really well and I’m very strict. And part of that is going to softplay, taking him swimming, keeping him active.
Amputees can often be down in the dumps, even suicidal. As soon as people do fitness it changes their life. I felt for some time life had dealt me a bad hand, but the once thing that turned me around and got me really focused was actually doing something for myself.
The only person you can thank for that it yourself, because no-one else puts in that effort, no-one else experiences that sweat, that pain and that determination. Then afterwards you can walk away feeling really proud.
Sophia Warner (running, triathlon)
I train or do exercise every day. I have recently learnt to swim and cycle and will do my first duathlon later this month and hope to race in a triathlon later in the year. I am helping to organise it – it’s called ParaTri.
Fitting in exercise is all about finding the time and making it a priority. It’s not an option for me to not find the time, and so I always do. I try and involve my children where I can and, with triathlon, it’s slightly easier as all kids like to swim and ride bikes.
I had my two children only 14 months apart. I have cerebral palsy, and with the use of only one hand, nappy changing, adjusting the car seat and the pushchair was impossible.
It was hard to go out with other mums as any mum needs to be an octopus at the best of times and I had a starting disadvantage.
After a few weeks, I decided to go back to work and my husband took over at home!
Without exercise, I wouldn’t be the mum I am and I want to be as fit and healthy as I can for my children. It’s also secretly reassuring that, despite my disability, I could still out run the non-disabled mums at sports day!
Liz McTernan (cycling, swimming)
I’m a single parent of two children and a full-time, unfunded athlete. My children, George (21) and Rebecca (19) are both now studying at university.
In the summer of 2005 I had a diving accident and was paralysed from the waist down. I was already a single mum by that point, though my children were much younger than they are now.
My son and daughter became my young carers, learning to cook meals and helping with my personal care. It was strange having our roles reversed for quite a few years. It was certainly a challenging time - there were so many simple household tasks that I couldn’t do which required their help. But they just got on with things.
As I gradually became more independent I felt that my kids should be children first and carers second, so I encouraged them to take up sport and activities and ferried them around all over the place.
We’ve tried various adaptive sports together over the years, including archery and sailing, water-skiing in Yorkshire, snow-skiing in America and scuba-diving in Egypt.
Both my children are sporty, so seeing me make time for exercise was very natural to them. It’s the feeling you get afterwards, that endorphin high. I love learning what my body is capable of and I don’t want to focus on what I can’t do. I like the physique I get when I’m fit and I hate people telling me I can’t.
Sport gives you everything you need in life!
Tanni Grey-Thompson on YouTube
Baroness Tanni Grey-Thompson (athletics, EFDS Honorary President)
It wasn't always easy balancing being a mum and a competitive athlete. There were times that is was quite chaotic, but there was also a lot of fun.
I remember building sandcastles in the long jump pit with my daughter and then spending just as long raking the sand for the guys to train in it afterwards.
I think it's really important that mum's do some physical activity with their children. It sets a really good example, especially to their daughters.
It is also really important to spend that time together. I try and play netball with my daughter, who is better than me, and then wheelchair basketball… I am still just a little bit better than her.
More information
Happy Mother’s Day, to any disabled and non-disabled mums out there. You’re all doing a brilliant job. We hope you can squeeze in that extra bit of physical activity each week and reap the benefits of an active family lifestyle.
Find an event near you on our website. Or read more on what is happening in your local area.
